Business
Must Read: True Life relationship story of A NYSC member
This is a true life story by a NYSC member, written by Money-Hungry… Read below:
“I was posted to an eastern state. Those three weeks I spent at NYSC camp were the worst three weeks of my life. After camping, I got my PPA posting and guess what, I was sent to a government girls secondary school to do my service!!!
I was beyond excited despite the location of the school. Omoh, d school dey 4 village but I no care, I was just happy to be a king among women (girls sha). Next, I and three other coppers went to the school to sign our acceptance letter.
Omoh, the principal come say she no want any coppers oh, say coppers dey corrupt her girls too much. Small tin I for cry oh, why this woman won come turn my wine to water na? Which kain devil be dis na?. We beg tire but d woman say we dey waste time say her decision na final. I then told the woman that I got a vision that God wants me to serve in that school.
She look me laff come say among all of us, na me she fear pass cuz her girls go pursue me. Wow!!!… I Don hang. But, “u look very gentle n responsible” was her next comment. I then gave her an innocent smile to cement her first mistake (she wouldn’t believe I could f**k the assistant principal). After a little brain-washing by me (trust me na), she accepted us and asked us to resume duty next week Monday……
I arrived the school on Monday morning feeling fly and ready for whatever. I was offered a table in the science lab which would serve as my office but I refused it cuz it was located at the junior section of the school. Nawa oh, wetin I dey do for Junior section when bad girls full senior section. Abeg I wan deal with mature girls jor.
Lucky me, I got transferred to the senior section to teach ss1 and offered a table at an office close to ss3 class. Baba
God, u too much!!. I walked into the office meant for three staff and met a female teacher who was busy and didn’t notice when I walked in.
“Good morning madam” I said. Then she looked up at me and replied “Copper, Good morning. You’re welcome”
Literally, my heart melted. I lost all my senses…. cuz sitting before me was the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. This woman eyes na die! Ebony skin, no make-up… even girls used to stare at her. Her name was Mrs venny. Also, I got to discover that she also had the most beautiful heart in the world. She was married and approximately ten years older than me but I still wished her husband would divorce her or drop dead … so that I could marry her. We chatted about a few things and became friends.
Twenty minutes later, the bell went off and it was time for my first class. Omoh, my heart dey beat like Don jazzy song, I need to compose myself well… no jonzing!. I grabbed my materials and headed to teach a class full of girls ……”
Omoh, as I enter d class, d girls come dey shout like say dem see jay-z. I come shout 4 dem say make them shut up! Dem dey mad?. Everybody come quiet and all eyes come dey on me, I come forget wetin I plan to talk sef.
Anyhow sha, I introduced myself and my subject. These girls were glad to have me… and I was glad to be here with them as the only male copper in the school. I be like tuface to them. As I dey teach, I discover say most of them na confirm olodo. Them no sabi anything but i later discover say them intelligent 4 bed and them bad to the bone. Some minutes into the lesson, I asked the class a question but no one answered. Then, a girl stood up and gave me the answer. Her name was Ella. Ella had an average face and Bottom but she had big bosoms. I come notice say these girls dey lift their skirts for me to see their pants. Chai! See fresh temptation. Omoh, my prick come dey rise small small so I come go Siddon 4 one sit to cover-up. All the while, I noticed that some of these girls had their eyes on me. I be fine boy small na. Particularly, a pair of eyes caught my attention. Guess who? Omoh, Ella dey look me!! As She dey look me 4 eye, I dey look her huge bosom-s…. Fantasizing about sucking them. After the class, I asked them if they had any questions. They said yes and started asking questions like “do you have a girlfriend?” “Can you speak Ibo?”. Haha! Una Don enter one chance this year. I just waved them off, smiled and went back to my office…. still fantasizing about Ella. I walked into my office, greeted Mrs venny and sat down and rested my head on my table to relax (oh, how I love to see this lady). Some minutes later, I heard a female voice say “sir, please can I borrow your text book? ”
I looked up and saw two pair of huge bosom-s pointing at me. You guessed right ….. it was Ella….
TO BE CONTINUED…
Business
Dennis Ekamah Isn’t Building Houses—He’s Redefining What Home Means for Africans Through PropTech
Dennis Ekamah Isn’t Building Houses—He’s Redefining What Home Means for Africans Through PropTech.
The founder of coHouse.ng is reimagining how millions of Africans access, experience, and share housing through technology.
In Africa’s rapidly evolving innovation landscape, the most transformative companies are no longer defined by the industries they enter, but by the systems they redesign.
For Dennis Ekamah, the opportunity was never about constructing buildings, it was about confronting a deeper question.
why is access to housing still so structurally difficult for millions of Africans in a digital age?
Rather than stepping into real estate as a developer. Dennis chose a different path, positioning coHouse.ng as a PropTech platform rethinking how housing is accessed, experienced, and shared. At the heart of this vision which is connecting potential home owners together via resource pooling for the purpose of either Living or Growth. Simply, *Connect. Live. Grow.*
*A Platform Not a Property Company*
coHouse.ng is not a real estate company. It is a technology-driven ecosystem connecting like-minded individuals into structured communities where they can live intentionally, invest collectively, and grow within a shared system.
From Insight to Recognition
In 2025, coHouse.ng was recognised among the Top 50 Tech Startups in Africa. Even ahead of its official launch, the platform attracted over 1,000 early waitlist users, individuals eager to be part of a new way of living and investing.
Solving for Access, Alignment, and Trust
Dennis Ekamah’s diagnosis goes deeper than supply shortfalls. The real barriers he argues are access, coordination, and trust. coHouse.ng tackles all three through identity verification powered by a third party verification system api. coHouse is not flying solo without the help and collaboration with government bodies across Nigeria and other African countries.
In his words;
“Imagine what you would achieve as an individual or group if you’re living with the right people or like-minded individuals around you.”
I’m not a developer, I’m not a professional realtor, I’m just someone who sees the need for this solution based on the problem we face as youth/young entrepreneurs in today’s housing deficiency across Africa.
— Dennis Ekamah
Join our waitlist by visiting www.cohouse.ng
Business
Landmark Judgment: Federal High Court Dismisses ₦50bn Oil Spill Claim Against ExxonMobil
Landmark Judgment: Federal High Court Dismisses ₦50bn Oil Spill Claim Against ExxonMobil
The Federal High Court sitting in Uyo has dismissed a ₦50 billion lawsuit filed against ExxonMobil, sued as Mobil Producing Nigeria Unlimited, now Seplat Energy Producing, in a ruling analysts say could significantly reshape oil spill litigation and compensation claims in Nigeria’s petroleum sector.
Delivering judgment on April 29, 2026, Justice Onyetenu held that the suit instituted by the Ejige Ore Njenyisi Muma & Fishing Co-operative Society Ltd was incompetent and liable to dismissal for lack of jurisdiction.
The plaintiffs had sought ₦50 billion in damages over an alleged hydrocarbon spill said to have occurred on September 12, 2021.
However, counsel to the defendant, Chinonso Ekuma of KENNA LP, successfully argued that the claimants failed to disclose any legally recognisable violation attributable to the oil firm.
In its findings, the court held that the plaintiffs failed to establish any actionable wrongdoing against the defendant.
A key element in the court’s decision was the Joint Investigation Visit (JIV) Report tendered by the plaintiffs themselves, which showed that the alleged spill incident was confined within ExxonMobil’s operational facility and did not impact the members of the cooperative society or their sources of livelihood.
The court further ruled that claims arising from such incidents must be pursued strictly under the statutory compensation framework provided in Section 11(5) of the Oil Pipelines Act, rather than through common-law claims founded on negligence or nuisance.
Justice Onyetenu held that the plaintiffs’ attempt to circumvent the statutory regime by framing the suit as a tort action rendered the matter incompetent before the court, thereby depriving it of jurisdiction.
Legal analysts say the judgment reinforces the supremacy of the Oil Pipelines Act in determining compensation procedures relating to oil pipeline incidents and environmental claims in Nigeria.
The ruling is also seen as strengthening the evidential weight of Joint Investigation Visit Reports, particularly in cases where such reports indicate no direct impact on claimants or host communities.
Industry observers believe the judgment will have far-reaching implications for future oil spill litigation, especially regarding the procedural requirements for compensation claims against oil operators.
The court’s decision further provides clarity for operators within Nigeria’s energy sector by reaffirming that compliance with Section 11(5) of the Oil Pipelines Act is mandatory and cannot be sidestepped through alternative legal formulations.
While K.O. Uzuokwu appeared for the plaintiffs, the defence was led by Chinonso Ekuma of KENNA LP on behalf of ExxonMobil.
Bank
Union Bank Honoured by ASBON at Nigeria National SME Business Awards
Union Bank Honoured by ASBON at Nigeria National SME Business Awards
Lagos, Nigeria – Union Bank of Nigeria has reaffirmed its reputation as a strong supporter of Nigerian businesses, receiving the Best SME Growth Banking Initiatives Award for 2025 from the Association of Small Business Owners of Nigeria (ASBON) at the Nigeria National SME Business Awards, held recently in Lagos.
The award was presented to the Bank in recognition of its strategic leadership in advancing the growth and resilience of small and medium-sized enterprises, through a differentiated suite of solutions designed to enable business expansion and long-term value creation.
Receiving the award on behalf of the Bank, Ayokunnumi Abraham, Head of SME Segment at Union Bank, described the recognition as a strong endorsement of the Bank’s commitment to supporting small and medium-sized businesses. He said:
“We are honoured to receive this recognition, which reflects Union Bank’s continued commitment to helping SMEs grow by making banking simpler, faster, and more accessible. Through enhancements to our specialised platforms such as Union360, we have meaningfully reduced the time it takes for businesses to come on board and begin transacting. These improvements have shortened onboarding, increased digital adoption among our SME customers, and supported the acquisition of new business clients. Our focus remains on delivering practical solutions that help Nigerian businesses thrive.”
Organised by ASBON in partnership with the Lagos State Government through the Ministry of Commerce, Cooperatives, Trade and Investment, the event convened stakeholders from the public and private sectors to recognise individuals and organisations driving meaningful impact across Nigeria’s SME ecosystem.
Union Bank remains focused on deepening its support for SMEs through customer-led solutions and processes that strengthen business growth across the ecosystem.
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