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7 Reasons Nigerian Marriages Are Crashing In The UK

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7 Reasons Nigerian Marriages Are Crashing In The UK

7 Reasons Nigerian Marriages Are Crashing In The UK

 

 

Nigerian Marriages always appear solid and formidable until the union gets a visa. The moment it passes through the UK Point of Entry, it starts to develop cracks until it takes more falls than the Naira under the current Tinubu administration. In this piece, I will be taking a dive into the common reasons why Nigerian marriages struggle on UK soil.

 

7 Reasons Nigerian Marriages Are Crashing In The UK

(1). Personal Vendetta:
Marriage as an institution in Nigeria is modeled around patriarchy – a system of male dominance. In this case, the man is the king while the woman is the queen. As you know, the king dominates the queen, and nothing he does is wrong in most cases (especially for the wealthy men). The woman could be forced to endure physical, verbal, psychological, financial abuse, and lots more. She stands to get mocked if her marriage crashes. This creates age-long bitterness and a cold war in the union. Women have a long memory and they hardly forgive. The moment the marriage transits to a society that gives women an upper hand against men, they come for their pound of flesh like Shylock. This destroys the foundation and subsequently brings it to an end.

(2). Level Playing field:
Marriage in Nigeria is a bit lopsided in terms of the professional profiles of the couples. In some cases, the husband might be a doctor while the wife might be selling beauty products or other petty items that cannot sustain her financially. The man steps in, and this gives him an undue edge in the marriage. In the UK where a hard-working bartender can match a nurse financially, and there is a level playing ground, power changes hands. The man who might be an alpha male loses that edge. This kind of equality – an unfamiliar territory for the man, if not well-managed might be the collapse of the marriage.

(3). Cultural Issues:
In the UK, the difference between a man and a woman might be that one menstruates and the other doesn’t. In fact, people switch genders according to their moods. In simple terms, there is no duty/responsibility that is totally exclusive to a man or woman. Over here, men go to the market, clean, wash, cook, babysit, run errands, and also fund the home. Local champions who are used to being served like emperors by their wives might struggle to cope with the new environment and could feel short-changed.

(4). Busy Schedules:
It is no longer news that the cost of living in the UK is as high as a COVID-19 patient’s temperature. In my previous articles, I have overemphasized how people inevitably work for long hours in order to cope with rising living expenses and financial demands from their families back home. This might affect bonding between young couples and reduce intimacy. Most times, when one party is ready for a “mid-section parley”, the other might be unavailable due to conflicting shift patterns, not being in the mood due to mental or physical stress. This gradually takes a negative toll on the marriage.

(5). Women Are Powerful Abroad:
In the West, there are checks to prevent the domination of women by men. This has made women so powerful. In the event of a conflict, the odds are always against the men. The Spanish FA chief, Luis Rubiales learned the hard way for controversially kissing midfielder, Jennifer Hermoso at the recently concluded 2023 Women’s World Cup. Also in February 2021, Yoshiro Mori – head of the Tokyo 2020 Olympic Games Organising Committee, was coerced into resigning after saying ‘women talk too much in meetings’. Former Manchester United player, Mason Greenwood apparently ruined his career due to struggles with his partner. In marriage, some women mischievously abuse their powers. A colleague lost his marriage of 5 years after his wife reportedly abused him physically multiple times. A behaviour that was never evident in Nigeria according to him.

(6). Cheating:
A randy man who is obsessed with beautiful women would easily make mistakes in the UK. The UK exposes you to numerous women of different shapes, forms, and beauty. If you think you have seen it all, you need to see the Jamaican, Somalian, Pakistani, Iranian, curvy Kenyans, and some pretty Indian women. It is not just how they look alone but what they are wearing. Some of them might fancy you and might be willing to hand you the cookie on a platter of gold. There are also several single mothers who have nothing to lose. They are ready to ‘share it’ graciously like the Federal Government palliatives across their community. One person’s husband might be hooked to the detriment of his marriage.

(7). Finances:
Another area of challenge in a UK home is money. In an informal survey I personally conducted, I realized it is the most common problem around. It is extremely difficult for a man to singlehandedly foot the household bills in the UK. Paying for everything is easily obtainable in Nigeria where the cost of living is lower. A woman who is used to the Nigerian system might be hoarding cash, and under-declaring her finances. This is done to force the man to fill the vacuum. This creates discontentment, and over time, frustration starts to hit the man. He might be tempted to seek solace outside the marriage to boost his mental health.

Osahon George Osayimwen is a Journalist and a Developmental Psychologist. He writes from the South Yorkshire region of England.

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ASR AFRICA FLAGS OFF CONSTRUCTION OF A N280 MILLION INTEGRATED PUBLISHING HOUSE FOR BABCOCK UNIVERSITY, ILISHAN-REMO, OGUN STATE, NIGERIA

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ASR AFRICA FLAGS OFF CONSTRUCTION OF A N280 MILLION INTEGRATED PUBLISHING HOUSE FOR BABCOCK UNIVERSITY, ILISHAN-REMO, OGUN STATE, NIGERIA

ASR AFRICA FLAGS OFF CONSTRUCTION OF A N280 MILLION INTEGRATED PUBLISHING HOUSE FOR BABCOCK UNIVERSITY, ILISHAN-REMO, OGUN STATE, NIGERIA

 

 

 

 

Sahara Weekly Reports That The Abdul Samad Rabiu Africa Initiative (ASR Africa), the philanthropic initiative of the Chairman of BUA Group, Abdul Samad Rabiu (CFR, CON), has flagged off the construction of a N280 million Abdul Samad Rabiu Integrated Publishing House for Babcock University, Ilishan-Remo, Ogun State. This project will enhance the capacity of the University from basic press status to a modern, integrated publishing house to encompass publishing, print production, and other related diversified services. The one-storey building facility will serve as a laboratory and studio for training students of communications, media studies, and allied disciplines as well as other disciplines.

 

 

 

ASR AFRICA FLAGS OFF CONSTRUCTION OF A N280 MILLION INTEGRATED PUBLISHING HOUSE FOR BABCOCK UNIVERSITY, ILISHAN-REMO, OGUN STATE, NIGERIA

 

 

 

 

At the groundbreaking event, the Vice Chancellor of the University, Prof. Ademola S. Tayo, expressed satisfaction at the nomination by ASR Africa, under its Tertiary Education Grant Scheme. He added that the choice of the project was a response to the vision to take the Mass Communications Department of the University to a whole new level. According to him, the university’s vision is to produce young men and women capable of critical thinking, and problem-solvers capable of proffering innovative solutions to problems of everyday life, be it social, political, and cultural.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In his response, Dr. Ubon Udoh, the Managing Director of ASR Africa, expressed his delight at the University’s choice of establishing an Integrated Publishing House. He added that when information is appropriately applied, human society is empowered to liberate itself from limitations and attain its full potential. Dr Udoh reiterated the commitment of the Chairman of ASR Africa, Abdul Samad Rabiu to supporting quality education within the tertiary education system in Nigeria and urged the institution to focus on the sustainability of this noble project. He also reiterated the importance of cooperation and collaboration between the university and the contractor for the timely delivery of the publishing house.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About ASR Africa

ASR Africa is the brainchild of African Industrialist, Philanthropist, and Chairman of BUA Group, Abdul Samad Rabiu, the Abdul Samad Rabiu Africa Initiative (ASR Africa) was established in 2021 to provide sustainable, impact-based, homegrown solutions to developmental issues affecting Health, Education and Social Development within Africa.

 

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President Bola Ahmed Tinubu GCFR, PLEASE, ACT FAST!

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President Bola Ahmed Tinubu GCFR, PLEASE, ACT FAST! by Comrade Oladimeji Odeyemi.

President Bola Ahmed Tinubu GCFR, PLEASE, ACT FAST!

by Comrade Oladimeji Odeyemi.

 

 

It’s no longer story that the preparation for the EndSars carnage went on for a while before its actual implementation.

 

President Bola Ahmed Tinubu GCFR, PLEASE, ACT FAST!
by Comrade Oladimeji Odeyemi.

 

But lack of proactive approach on the part of some people in the government of the day became a recipe for the actualisation of the dastardly act. History is about to be repeated, but I do not expect this to happen under the watch of President Bola Tinubu.

I do not say that people should not be allowed to protest if they have any reason to do so. But given the fact that the country does not have the capacity to separate genuine protesters from hoodlums, unnecessary protest should be curtailed.

Some people may be surprised that I call it unnecessary protest.

Yes, it’s unnecessary because this government has never displayed any act of rigidity since it took the mantle of leadership. It responds even to mere comments on social media expressly within. It is clear to every discerning and positive citizen that this government has become one of the most engaging one since 1999.

It has engaged with the organised labour on the minimum wage and it’s being passed to law. It has won autonomy for local government councils. It is on course for disbursements of students’ loans. It has given tax waiver for certain commodities and goods. You only protest against a government that is either passive, incorrigible or rigid. How can a government that is barely a year in office be protested against even when it has surpassed many of the past ones within one year? That cannot be called a protest but a mischief.

President Bola Tinubu should not be deceived by those who harp on funny fundamental human rights to cause mayhem. America is the country they use as a reference point. But American government does not take untoward attitude from anyone. If you want some you will be given some. There is no way for avoidable discomfort.

Kenyans are licking their wounds at the moment. We must not allow our own case to get to that point. I believe that many of those who are planning for the protest are children who do not know the implications of such a protest. Those who are old among them are those who would gladly set their universities’ libraries on fire in the name of students’ demonstration just because water tap didn’t run at the expected time.

Please, begin to show us that we have someone in charge of our affairs. Be more presidential Your Excellency. We know that it’s those who lost elections in 2023 and those they have recruited among those who think you have not compensated them among your conditional supporters that are behind the protest.

Please, refuse to be blackmailed. No matter what you do, there is but one mind in those people and it is turned against you. Please do everything humanly possible for PH REFINERY to work. Support Dangote Refinery to get crude oil locally.

We must not be importing fuel forever. Therefore, you should beware of the sinister motive of the August 1 planned protest, Your Excellency. May you continue to succeed and may all patriotic Nigerians continue to progress in all spheres of life in the mighty name of God.

Comrade Oladimeji Odeyemi is an entrepreneur, opinion leader and a security analyst.

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Law Enforcement Training Institute ( LETI ) Commences Annual Mandatory Training

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Law Enforcement Training Institute ( LETI ) Commences Annual Mandatory Training.

 

 

The Lagos State Law Enforcement Training Institute ( LETI ) begins her Annual Mandatory Training Exercise for the year 2024 for Law Officers across the state.

The exercise, which will run for a duration of six weeks brings together officers from the Lagos State Traffic Management Authority ( Lastma ), the Lagos State Environmental Sanitation Corps ( Kai ), the Vehicle Inspection Service ( Vis ), the Lagos Neighbourhood Safety Corps ( Lnsc ) and the Central Business District ( Cbd ) law Officers.

In her opening remarks, the CEO / Head of Leti Mrs Abiola Adeyinka emphasised on the importance of continual training for Law Officers to ” be at their best” and to ” embrace the opportunity to enhance their skills and knowledge.” she stressed the need for professionalism, integrity, and respect for the Rule of Law in the discharge of their duties as respectable officers of the state of excellence. The training program will cover a wide range of topics to include:
* Traffic management and Enforcement.
* Public safety and security.
* Human right and law enforcement.
* Conflict resolution etc.
* Interpersonal relations to mention but few.

Mrs Adeyinka reteirated the State government commitment to ensuring that Leti delivers on its mandate of providing high quality training to Law enforcement Officers in the state.

According to the Ceo, “The Governor of Lagos State has pledged the full support of his administration to Leti in its efforts to enhance the professionalism and effectiveness of Law enforcement in Lagos State. The annual mandatory training exercise is a testament to the Lagos State government commitment to ensuring a safe, secure and well- managed environment for all residents.

Law Enforcement Training Institute ( LETI ) Commences Annual Mandatory Training.

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